How to “Not Take Things Personally” Naturally When Hit With Harshness, Criticism + Gaslighting — EP131

“Not taking things personally” can be a tough job being a human with emotions and a body! When criticism, harshness, judgment, lashing out, gaslighting, and other reactions from another person can hit us where it hurts, here are some tools to support healing and resolving where it hurts so it’s not just a forced “tough skin” but an organic neutrality or wholeness that leaves us able to be present to what is.

Work with ways to heal the shadow and allow harmony where others push their shadow parts your way. A deep love for yourself, which is loving for all.

At the very least, to digest the emotions we feel when triggered and to experience separation and boundary that gives us room to breathe, feel safer, and more loved from the inside.

Two experientials follow this episode next week where I guide you through a shift through distance and space, boundary, forgiveness, and separation from dependency, as well as to look towards and heal the part of us that gets wounded.

Please use the player below to listen or download this episode. To make it easier for you to get new episodes on your phone, you can also subscribe for new episodes on Apple Podcast, Spotify, and other platforms.

The Web of the Shadow: Working With Another’s Shadow Or Wounded Parts — EP131a

It’s uncomfortable when someone discards or disavows a hurt part of themselves, their shadow, and it comes lashing towards you. Or, when you’re triggered and you need some distance and boundary to feel emotionally safe. This experiential is to support sensing the context of the other person, creating harmony with distance, and restoring energetic and physical boundaries.

Love Your the Wounded Part: Healing Experiential for Interpersonal Triggers — EP131b

Be with and witness the part of you that is wounded when a situation or person’s actions trigger you. In this guided experiential, we give loving space to the part of you that got wounded and move the frequencies of certain belief sets that are at the root of it with self-forgiveness… Bringing the organic feeling of neutrality that allows you to not take things personally.

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Healing Share Sponsorship Program

About 25% of my healing sessions are sliding scale with my personal contributions. If you’d like to help me in supporting others in receiving healing sessions, consider sharing your resources to support someone or your community in a unique and important way!

Consider contributing to sliding scale sessions for those who need healing support and may not be able to pay a full fee. Healing sessions can be truly life-changing for someone, giving them support to integrate any trauma, bring their presence to life, or cultivate self-love.

Your support may go to someone who: is an elder, BIPOC, LGBTQIA, or a person that has been affected financially by difference and power Covid19 or Systemic Issues (systemic racism or discrimination), is an unpaid or low paid community organizer, has immigration-related expenses, has children or other dependents, is a student, or receives public assistance.

For more information about contributing or receiving from the Healing Share, check out at CandiceWu.com/healingshare.

Links and Resources

Working With and Navigating Emotions, Pendulation, and Bringing Embodied Safety

Dealing With Overwhelm and Polyvagal Basics

Strengthen Your Energetic Boundaries

Worthiness

Toxic Family Relationship Dynamics

Family Constellations 101

Show Notes

  • 00:00 Intro
  • 01:24 Opening — Starting My Garden
  • 03:32 Topic Overview
  • 04:07 Healing Share Program
  • 05:29 A Recent Experience
  • 07:09 It’s Incredibly Hard to Not Take Things Personally
  • 09:14 How to Move Through Experiences That Hurt
  • 12:54 Even Strangers Can Hurt or Trigger
  • 13:46 Learning to Harness My Own Energy and Boundary
  • 16:07 Connecting With the Collective Experience
  • 17:31 Being Shaped by Early Life Experience
  • 18:34 Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn
  • 19:07 Pleasing Others is a Tool but Exhausting
  • 21:53 Tools for a Clearer Way
  • 25:36 Clearing Belief Sets Around Codependency
  • 28:46 Looking at the Conversation and Placing What Was Said
  • 32:27 A Few More Tricks
  • 40:38 Thanking the People
  • 41:51 Upcoming Experientials
  • 44:38 Gratitude
  • 45:03 The Embody Newsletter
  • 45:13 Healing Share Program

Intro Music by Nick Werber

Featured Photo by Denys Argyriou on Unsplash

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