Core Erotic Themes Fantasy & BDSM with Harmony — EP51

This episode contains explicit and sexual content/language. It is not suitable for all audiences or ages.

This episode is about the juicy creativity of life: sex! Harmony, the founder of Kink From the Couch — a Somatica® counseling practice based in San Francisco, and I explore:

  • Ritual in relationships
  • BDSM as the “New Romance”
  • Her experiences as a professional dominant and Somatica Practitioner
  • Dominance and submission
  • Acceptance around “unacceptable” for oneself / Releasing shame around fantasies
  • Touching into core desire in your erotic themes
  • Seamless verbal and nonverbal consent and the #MeToo movement
  • Shadow and archetype in sexuality
  • Embodying fantasies

The Somatica Method recognizes that we learn primarily through our bodies. Using a combination of talk therapy and experiential exercises, Harmony leads clients to embrace their full sexual selves without shame. Under her guidance, you will find your own erotic embodiment, while developing your negotiation and practical BDSM skills, and other vital practices needed to bring healthy kink into your relationships.

Harmony’s path to becoming a sex counselor took her through many vibrant Bay Area communities, including tantra, orgasmic meditation, the human potential movement, and NLP. She was an independent professional dominant for a decade. She developed her D/s skills at Cleo Dubois’ Academy of SM Arts and studied bondage with Midori. From 2009–11, she wrote educational articles about BDSM as the editor for the Society of Janus, the Bay Area’s oldest kink non-profit. Her current practice synthesizes all the wisdom she’s gained along that winding road.

Please use the player below to listen or download this episode. To make it easier for you to get new episodes on your phone, you can also subscribe for new episodes on Apple Podcast, Spotify, and other platforms.

Visualization: The Heart of Your Hottest Sexual Fantasy — EP51a

Kinky or not, dive into your hottest sexual fantasy. Harmony walks you through a Somatica Practice of embodying your hottest sexual fantasy that is specific to YOU, and in zeroing in on the core erotic themes that turn you on.

Audience Gift

Harmony is offering a complimentary 20 – 40-minute session around Exploring Core Erotic Themes. Please email her on her website to connect with her to explore your fantasies and deepen in your pleasure.

Contact

Harmony, Founder of Kink from the Couch

Website

Special Note

Dec 17, the publish date of this podcast is International Day to End Violence against Sex Workers.

We stand in solidarity with sex workers and end violence against sex workers who also may be POC, transwomen, immigrants, and others who have be stigmatized or abused – This week, many sex worker communities and social justice organizations will raise awareness about violence that’s committed against sex workers and remember those who have been lost or hurt.

“We cannot end the marginalization and victimization of all sex workers without also fighting trans-phobia, racism, stigma and criminalization of drug use, and xenophobia…The assault, battery, rape and murder of sex workers must end. Racism, economic inequality, systems of colonialist and state violence and oppression must end. The stigma and discrimination and criminalization that makes violence against us acceptable must end.” ~ From www.december17.org.

Find out more about International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers.

If you or someone you know someone who needs support, please call the National Sex Worker Hotline: 877–776–2004 (USA)

Sponsored by The Sound Sleep Album

Do you wish for better sleep for the holidays?

This episode is brought to you by the Sound Sleep Alchemy Album. An album of 11 healing experientials and meditations, yoga poses, marma points, and spiritual guide that will help you feel more grounded, restful, and easeful in your sleep and throughout the day.

It is the stepping stone towards healing trauma, feeling embodied, bringing your nervous system to a baseline where you feel relaxed and calm, and looking at the deeper aspects of sleep issues.

Your support by ordering an album helps me make more healing albums, content, and produce more podcast episodes.

The Sound Sleep Album is on sale through the new year for $11 (until 2019–01–05).

Thank you for your support!

Learn more at candicewu.com/soundsleep

Links & Resources mentioned in this Episode

Show Notes

  • 0:00 Intro
  • 1:11 Sponsored by the Sound Sleep Album
  • 2:17 Opening
  • 4:07 December 17th
  • 6:15 Conversation Start
  • 7:09 Harmony’s Journey of Being a Pro-Domme to Kink from the Couch
  • 8:02 How Did You Know You Found Your Calling?
  • 9:25 Listening to Clients’ Fantasies
  • 10:41 How to Talk to Your Partner About Your Fantasies
  • 12:08 Core Desire — Having What You Want Is a Big Step
  • 14:36 What Have You Learned About Yourself Through Fantasy?
  • 18:19 Her Experience as a Dominatrix | Awareness Good for Life
  • 18:19 Yes, Yes, and Yes… Empowering, Challenging, Healing
  • 20:06 What to Do When You Don’t Know What to Do…
  • 21:39 Don’t Be Afraid to Go Slow
  • 21:39 Moments of Up, Up, Up, and Savor
  • 23:08 Dominance in Other Areas (Horses)
  • 23:42 Step Into Your Dominant Self
  • 25:45 Dominance Can Have Connotations / Design It for Yourself
  • 27:39 Shadow Aspects of Harmony’s Work and Experiences
  • 28:26 Shadow Stuff Coming Out
  • 29:54 The Power of Creating a Safe Container
  • 30:40 Feeling in Control in One Part of Life Gives You the Ability to Give Up Control in Others
  • 32:47 Submissive Role Can Give a Pause on Controlling Things in Life
  • 33:26 Alive Right Now | #Metoo and Consent
  • 36:47 Non-Verbal Consent Techniques
  • 37:32 Practicing Boundaries & Revisiting Them (Not Scared to Touch the Boundaries)
  • 39:12 Somatica FAQ
  • 39:40 Consent and Negotiations
  • 41:11 Working With Sexual Archetypes
  • 42:20 Archetype Gives Space for Authenticity in the Role
  • 44:41 How Is Touch Incorporated in Somatica?
  • 48:03 Learnings From Somatica for Harmony
  • 48:40 Audience Gift : Exploring Core Erotic Themes
  • 50:27 How External Input Can Change Your View on a Fantasy
  • 52:21 A Story About Fantasies Showing a Piece of Yourself
  • 55:57 Fantasy Going Against Your Beliefs (Cock-Sucking = Not Feminist?)
  • 56:52 Submissive Is Not About Being Weak but Proving to Yourself That You Are Strong
  • 58:33 Knowing Fantasies Brings Conscious Solutions Rather Than Destructive in Relationships
  • 59:11 Story About Cock-Sucking & Foot Fetish
  • 1:00:24 Creating Fantasies Intentionally So They Aren’t Destructive but Pleasurable
  • 1:02:00 Acceptance Around Unacceptable for Oneself
  • 1:02:49 Pleasure in the Poignancy of the Pain
  • 1:03:52 Some of the Moments I Felt Most Alive Have Been in BDSM Contacts With Extreme Pain
  • 1:04:16 When Did I Last Check in With My Fantasies?
  • 1:06:38 Where Can People Find Harmony?
  • 1:07:13 Outro
  • 1:10:15 Embody Community & Newsletter

Intro Music by Nick Werber

Your Support Means So Much!

If The Embody Podcast, my writing, or guided healing meditations have inspired you, helped, or spoken to you, it would mean the world to me if you would show your support through a small donation.

Each creation is lovingly made from my soul and takes anywhere from weeks to a few days to develop and produce. I gladly pay an editor who supports me in polishing and creating high quality content.

As little as $2 help nourish my podcast and other creations to continue to have life and cover costs.

You can also take a look at my offerings which can deepen your embodiment on your own journey. Proceeds from those offerings also help me in the creation of more resources and material.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart! I am so appreciative.

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